Camilla Battista Da Varano Round Religious Medal "EXCLUSIVE"

On 14 November 1481, Camilla entered the monastery of the Poor Clares at Urbino and took the name Baptista.[8] She described the step in Biblical terms, as having been freed from the 'slavery of Egypt' (referring to the world), and from 'the hands of powerful Pharaoh' (referring to her father), that she had 'crossed the Red Sea' (left the court life), and was 'placed in the desert of holy religion' (entered a monastery).[4] Varano made her profession in 1483 and claimed it was a bittersweet moment for her, as there was much political and religious controversy about her decision to become a nun. It was during her stay at Urbino that she wrote Ricordi di Gesu, a meditation in the form of a letter from Jesus to her. She intensified her meditations on the Passion and claimed to enter more deeply into the mental pains of the heart of Jesus.[4] On 4 January 1484 Varano and eight other of her companions transferred to the new Monastery of Santa Maria Nuova at Camerino (located near her father's castle),[1][9] in a monastery which her father had purchased from the Olivetan monks and restored in order to have his daughter closer to him.[5] Her father had made arrangements with the Vicar General of the Observant Franciscans, under whose authority the Poor Clares operated, and the pope, in order to have her re-located there. Battista, however, was reluctant to do and moved only under obedience.[4] One of the most significant points in Varano's spiritual life occurred then, when she had a vision lasting fifteen days of St. Clare of Assisi. She wrote that she did not recognize the nun at first, but afterwards she knew that it was Clare, the foundress of her Order, and the experience caused her love and devotion to St. Clare to intensify. It was a few days after this that she had a vision of two cherubim holding her at the bleeding feet of Christ (described below), which lasted two months. She had another vision following this of God's love, which afterwards convinced her of her unworthiness, and she asked God to always remain prostrate at Christ's feet. The next five years she recorded as being filled with inner suffering that gave her a desire to leave the body and be with Christ.[4] In 1488, Camilla wrote I dolori mentali di Gesu nella sua Passione (The mental sorrows of Christ during his Passion), which followed from her long meditations on this topic. It was written as a meditation by an anonymous nun to her abbess, and it consists in Christ's presenting eight of His sorrows: the damned, the elect, his mother, Mary Magdalen, the apostles, Judas, the Jewish people, and the ingratitude of all creation.[4] The following five years were ones wherein she experienced a spiritual crisis. She wrote that she was battling with the devil, as she felt abandonment and desolation while being haunted with temptations to rebel against God and to disbelieve the scriptures. During this period, between 27 February and 13 March 1491 she composed 'Vita Spirituale', (Spiritual Life, or her Autobiography) which was a long letter to Domenico of Leonessa (the preacher who had inspired her tear drops as a child). In the letter she told him how he had inspired her spiritual life and expressed his gratitude to him. She thought that this would be her last testament before dying, but she was to live on for another 30 years.[4] In 1492 she met Don Antonio, a Spanish Olivetan monk, who became her spiritual director for four years. Her father founded a new monastery of that Order at Camerino, and presented it to his daughter. By the time she turned 35 years of age, she was elected Abbess for the first time, a position she continued to hold for several terms.[5] She was elected abbess of her monastery in 1500 (she had been made Vicar in 1488), and she was elected again in 1507, 1513 and 1515.